How the GOP scares Jews.”

Isn’t it how the GOP scares pretty much everyone without a functioning brain?

Mortgage forgiven to woman who shot self.”

Finally! An answer for all those struggling homeowners!

“Bush to keep troop levels in Iraq for ’08.”

Who could’ve guessed? Well, Atrios and his readers, for 100,000 or so. I suspect there are more.

Hilariously and horrifyingly predictable.

I find it amusing that nobody in the Corporate Media is even mentioning that Bush and Cheney just might be skipping the GOP Convention because, well, most people despise them.

From the Dept. of Funny Headlines: “FEMA vows to be ‘proactive this time.'” That’s great news! I mean, who could have seen Katrina coming?

Still can’t get a clue on Palin. All I’m sure of now is that she’ll energize those single-issue abortion voters, maybe get some NRA men on board, and give Senator McCain some masturbation fantasy material.

Off to spend Memorial Day Sunday with some quality family time. We’re sending a boy off to the Navy. God bless him.

Update: Ana Marie sort of does the trick, though it is in a blog post, which not so many people read.

“Wife blasted for keeping Edwards affair secret.”

Yeah, because every married woman with a terminal illness who may or may not have forgiven her husband for something that goes on in “mainstream America” all the time wants to advertise the marriage’s personal problems. Which virtually all married Americans deal with daily. Not necessarily this particular issue, but others for sure. Marriage, like politics, ain’t beanbag.

It sure is easy to see why Media Man is portrayed so poorly among people in the know.

“God trumps doc.”

I do believe I have just solved our health care issue. Let these folks opt out.

(This poll has to be flawed, just for the record. Half? I wonder why only 17% don’t have health insurance?)

“‘Where was God?’, ask refugees in Russia.”

Um, er, uh, pretty much where God has always been when it comes to the minutiae of the Human Existence.

If there’s one thing I know for sure about God, and I admit to knowing nothing but what I can objectively see, it’s that He/She/It doesn’t pay too much attention to the details.

I’m forever amazed that the rest of the world hasn’t figured this out.

“McCain seen as best choice for economy.”

Jesus Christ.

If you read further, you’ll see this opinion is the consensus among rich people.

This shit cracks me up.

Here’s some actual information to process.

“Poll: Obama faces racial divide.”

In other news, many Americans hate and/or fear the black man.

Yeah, we get it, Newsweek. The question is whether or not racism will prevail, and how much you and your cohorts in the Corporate Media will do to enable it.

Is there any politician on the national stage more hated than Lieberman?

Yeah, but still. Joe is at least working towards #1.

Funny Headline.