The recent spate of passengers hassling TSA officials is nothing but a large statistical population-at-the-edge of the bell curve reaction to the omnipresence of The Man.

We’ll know things are serious and sensible when passengers start charging for a junk feel. It goes like this:

“Ma’am, we’re going to do [this].”

“That’s fine, that’ll be $20.”

“Ma’am?”

“$20.”

“Ma’am, what are you saying? Should we call security?”

“That won’t be necessary, IMO. You’re asking for some very private information, and I’m charging you for it. Consider it similar to the fees you charge me whether I’m clean or not. Heck, consider it similar to the fees you charge me for everything. I paid $100 to fly myself from Denver to Chicago this year, and you charged me $250 for my dog. My dignity is worth money.”

“Security!”

You get enough of that kind of thing and you have yourself some attention.

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