Just bought, in a blizzard no less, all the accoutrement I need for a new puppy critter.

Not only that, I believe I have all the 79 items checked off the list in order to adopt a dog who needs a good home, which it’ll get, period, end of story.

So that part is kind of stressful and weird. Explaining your worthiness when you get offended by the question itself on any particular thing, while simultaneously understanding and even appreciating that they’re just making sure I’m not going to feed the darling they’ve been fostering to pit-bulls preparing for dog-fighting or leave it alone for days/weeks at at time, is a rare example of a circumstance my tongue, very near literally, is tied. It’s at least completely dysfunctional.

I don’t know any bad dogs, because I don’t know any bad parents.